I was snuggled up in bed with Callista last night when, out of the blue, she said, “Mama, you should have had twins.”

I was sure I hadn’t heard her right, so I asked for clarification. “Twins? What?”

Callista: “Yeah, twins. You should’ve had twins, not triplets.”

Me: “I like having triplets! I would be so sad if I didn’t have one of you.”

Callista: “But if there were only two of us, it wouldn’t take us so long to get ready in the morning. You should’ve had twins. Only two.”

Me: *tries not to laugh* “You’re right – it wouldn’t take so long, but I like having triplets. Don’t you like being a triplet?”

Callista: “Yes, I like being triplets, but I’m only going to have twins when I’m a mama. What do you call it when there’s only one baby?”

Me: “A singleton.”

Callista: “That’s a funny word. Just one baby would be REALLY easy.”

End scene

This conversation was significant for a few reasons.

1. It’s like a punch in the gut for Ninja Baby of all people to ponder the difference between me having twins or triplets. I’ve mentioned to Callista in the past that she hid from us when she was in my tummy and we thought she was gone, but she obviously has no idea what that really meant. I still can’t wrap my head around that part of last night’s conversation.

2. How does a 4-year-old have the concept of triplets/twins/singletons and how having multiples changes things? Sure, I’ve flippantly said, “Because there are three of you!” in response to questions about why we aren’t in the car yet or why I’m running around like a chicken with my head cut off or God only knows how many other situations they ask why we aren’t ________ yet. On the flipside, I make it a point to let them know how much I love having triplets and how special I think it is for each of them to be a triplet along with talking about how much they like being triplets. Andplusalso, I am forever disagreeing with strangers in public about how difficult or busy or any other negative must come from having triplets.

I don’t ever want one of my kids to think life would be better if they weren’t triplets (in fact, one of my biggest parenting goals is to do as much with them as I would if they weren’t triplets – camping, beach, Disney, road trips, regular errands/excursions, etc.). I’m still not sure that’s what Callista was saying, but the conversation is really sticking with me.


4 Responses to ‘You should’ve had twins’

  1. Wow! That’s crazy coming from your Ninja baby. I do think kids are very self-aware at four, moreso than most people give them credit for. I certainly knew at that age it’d be easier to not have my younger brother, so it’d make sense for her to think one less of them.

    Though I’m not sure I’d get the concept of twins/triplets at that age… but since they are triplets, maybe they are more aware? I’d also certainly not know what it would mean for my brother to NOT be there, which I’m assuming she doesn’t understand either.

    Kids say the darndest things. The conversation would definitely stick with me as well.

  2. Suz says:

    Wild how she picked up on how much easier it’d be! & so sweet that she’s thinking of you. Love that she is up for twins & agrees a singleton would be “easy”! Tell her to come visit if she wants to see just how wild mornings are with two toddlers!!!

  3. At least she wasn’t trying to sell off a brother or sister, I suppose hahaha. 😉

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